dessert

Today

I had the deep NEED to go to F&E and get a dessert, but Lexi had to agree to eat it with me so I didn't feel like a total fatty.

I was staring at the bakery section when I was assaulted by one of those overly friendly people who just talk to you for no reason. And talk to you and talk to you and talk to you.

She wanted to tell me all about how store-bought pies don't have enough apples in them.

I told her that's why she should make her own

"Sorry but I'm not a cook," she replied.

I shrugged and went back to staring at the desserts. Tiramisu? Cupcakes? Cheesecake?

"But you're saying this as you look at prepared foods," she added.

I thought about slapping her. I simply grimaced.

She continued to tell me how her mother taught her about crust color and how that signifies a good pie from a bad one when looking at store-bought pies.

She even went so far as to make me hold the pie she was examining, to agree with her about how heavy it was.

Right as I was about to snap this woman's neck, I realized that she was wearing a soft foam neck brace. Someone else earlier this week had already done it for me. Apparently she did not learn her lesson and was continuing to talk off the ears of perfect strangers. So as to not force this woman to wear one of these, I walked away, lurking in the pasta aisle until it was safe to get a dessert.